if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My Higher Power is John Stamos
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I touched a dick in church today
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
