I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Randomize
