Porn is love you can see.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
