Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
