Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i drank out of a bidet.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize
