yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
