I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
