Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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