In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
