She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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