I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
bring money and cleavage
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
