My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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