the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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