yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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