omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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