he was CRYING into my vagina
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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