Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
