put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
