Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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