I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
