dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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