I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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