Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
