I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
this will be a night to untag.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??