you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
