I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
this just has baby written all over it
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
