fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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