hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just want to make out with him forever
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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