I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
