i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
