12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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