I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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