I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
