you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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