Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
