I got chris browned last night
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize