I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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