The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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