yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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