i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
