respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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