So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
