I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
