I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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