god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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