Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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