All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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