I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
