He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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