U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
